Stay Classy, Get Sexy,
J.Ellen
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Don't. You. Dare. Bodyspiration part 2
Okay so not only is she super hot and inspirational for working out, but she's also glaring into your soul and threatening to destroy you Black Widow style if you f*** up. Yeah. This is now my background. Call me a lesbo, don't care, my inspiration kicks a**. Today is Halloween, so I've been a little naughty, eating a candy bar and such, BUT. I'm allowed to, as are you. But after today, we shall FIGHT FOR THE BOD OF MY WOMAN SCAR JO. We've got this. Happy Halloween everybody!
Signs that I don't like you
1.) I consistently don't capitalize my I's and always forget apostrophes. I am quite a grammar Nazi, so this is a big, "I don't really want to talk to you so I'm going to be completely lazy whilst talking to you."
2.) I am not sarcastic around you. It's a symbol of my endearment. If I am not sarcastic around you, I probably don't like you enough to indulge you in my quality, dry humor.
3.) If you don't like, or at least appreciate horses, I probably don't like you.
4.) If you think wearing fur is okay, I probably don't like you.
5.) One letter answers. HUGE symbol: I definitely don't like you and don't want to talk to you.
6.) If you are discriminatory, (race, orientation, religion etc.) I don't want to say I don't like, because that's kind of reverse discrimination, but I don't. If you are going to discriminate, you're kind of asking for it, sorry. I'm not here to be nice. I'm here to be honest.
7.) If I have to correct your Mean Girls, Back to the Future, Freaky Friday, Disney/Pixar, JennaMarbles etc. etc. etc. quotations... You are irritating me. If you can't quote it correctly, don't quote it.
8.) If you insult Kewwoh, I immediately refuse to like you. Ever. The End.
Stay Classy, don't piss me off,
J.Ellen
2.) I am not sarcastic around you. It's a symbol of my endearment. If I am not sarcastic around you, I probably don't like you enough to indulge you in my quality, dry humor.
3.) If you don't like, or at least appreciate horses, I probably don't like you.
4.) If you think wearing fur is okay, I probably don't like you.
5.) One letter answers. HUGE symbol: I definitely don't like you and don't want to talk to you.
6.) If you are discriminatory, (race, orientation, religion etc.) I don't want to say I don't like, because that's kind of reverse discrimination, but I don't. If you are going to discriminate, you're kind of asking for it, sorry. I'm not here to be nice. I'm here to be honest.
7.) If I have to correct your Mean Girls, Back to the Future, Freaky Friday, Disney/Pixar, JennaMarbles etc. etc. etc. quotations... You are irritating me. If you can't quote it correctly, don't quote it.
8.) If you insult Kewwoh, I immediately refuse to like you. Ever. The End.
Stay Classy, don't piss me off,
J.Ellen
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Les Miserables: Excitement yet drawbacks & CAST REVIEW: ALL the review in obsession...
So in history today, we had a brief discussion on the musical rendition of Les Miserables that is coming out in December of 2012. Because I am one of the biggest Hugh Jackman/Les Mis fans of all time, I'm giving an expected review.
Overall: This better blow my effing socks off. The 1998 non-musical rendition of Les Mis featuring Liam Neeson (who I'm not a huge fan of) as Jean Val Jean was pretty damn good for not having the amazing music written by Andrew Lloyd Webber. So this... I genuinely have Oscar award winning expectations for this movie. I kid you not. Many, (aside from the Avengers of course, but that's a totally different genre and Pitch Perfect which was just funny) many many many movies this year have been a total flop and disappointment to me this year. I have HIGH expectations, especially because of the cast, here is how I feel about them:
Hugh Jackman -- Jean Val Jean: HOLY. SH**. I can't explain my excitement. Hugh Jackman is one of my favorite triple threats in not only the film industry, but also the theater industry. He can play anyone and prove his value as an actor in any role he is given... and shocker... when he acts, I see the CHARACTER, not Hugh Jackman (K.Stew, take notes!) He was not only the epitome of perfect wolverines in the X-men movies (as a comic book reader, he was perfect. No argument necessary) but he was also a freaking awesome Curly in the London stage production of "Oklahoma!" So yeah. Excellent choice film industry.
Anne Hathaway - Fantine: HOLY. SH** PART 2: I am not the biggest Anne Fan. I'm really not. When she acts, I see HER, not her character. But after seeing her pure, raw, heart wrenching emotion, and LISTENING to possibly one of the most beautiful renditions of "I dreamed a dream" I can officially say that I am freaking excited as all get out to see her performance as the contrite, broken-hearted, ever-sacrficing Fantine. THAT BEING SAID: Anne, I have high expectations for you, I am not going to take it easy on you. You better bring tears to my tear-ductless eyes.
Amanda Seyfried -- I think there is someone better out there to play Cosette. Yeah. I think she's over rated, The only part she's ever played that I thought was funny was Karen Smith in Mean Girls. But that's about it. I think she's okay, but in a movie THIS powerful, they needed someone a little less... "cute" and a little more... er... talented. Sorry Amanda, you're cute and I love you, but there's got to be someone better. I will however, have a WHOLE NEW level of respect for her if she kicks a** in her role as Cosette.
Russel Crowe-- Javert: Russel Crowe. High high high high high expectations. Will destroy him if he blows this. Nuff' said.
Samantha Barks - Eponine --> Yeah I actually have no idea who this is. All I have to say, is that she has big a** shoes to fill, and if she doesn't... I'm going to hunt her down and demand a refilm.
Helena Bonham Carter as Madame Thenardier: YAY. I have no doubts she is going to nail this. Helena is fricking crazy face but this isn't a Tim Burton film (respect) so I think she's really going to branch out into awesomeness in this role. Helena, don't let me down and make me look like an idiot girl!
And that beautiful little child Isabelle Allen, playing little Cosette: Better bring f***ing tears. She's freaking adorable in appearance. "Castle on a Cloud" better make me weep. Break a Leg little one!
So yeah. That's how that is going down. I better be morbidly impressed or someone is going to get angry phone calls from me. Then I will go through the phone like the girl on the ring in a tv (terrible movie btdubs) and kill them and suck their souls. Then go in my well and cry. So yeah. Don't disappoint me Hollywood. Or sh**... will go the eff down.
Stay Classy, GO SEE THIS EFFING MOVIE.
J.Ellen
Overall: This better blow my effing socks off. The 1998 non-musical rendition of Les Mis featuring Liam Neeson (who I'm not a huge fan of) as Jean Val Jean was pretty damn good for not having the amazing music written by Andrew Lloyd Webber. So this... I genuinely have Oscar award winning expectations for this movie. I kid you not. Many, (aside from the Avengers of course, but that's a totally different genre and Pitch Perfect which was just funny) many many many movies this year have been a total flop and disappointment to me this year. I have HIGH expectations, especially because of the cast, here is how I feel about them:
Hugh Jackman -- Jean Val Jean: HOLY. SH**. I can't explain my excitement. Hugh Jackman is one of my favorite triple threats in not only the film industry, but also the theater industry. He can play anyone and prove his value as an actor in any role he is given... and shocker... when he acts, I see the CHARACTER, not Hugh Jackman (K.Stew, take notes!) He was not only the epitome of perfect wolverines in the X-men movies (as a comic book reader, he was perfect. No argument necessary) but he was also a freaking awesome Curly in the London stage production of "Oklahoma!" So yeah. Excellent choice film industry.
Anne Hathaway - Fantine: HOLY. SH** PART 2: I am not the biggest Anne Fan. I'm really not. When she acts, I see HER, not her character. But after seeing her pure, raw, heart wrenching emotion, and LISTENING to possibly one of the most beautiful renditions of "I dreamed a dream" I can officially say that I am freaking excited as all get out to see her performance as the contrite, broken-hearted, ever-sacrficing Fantine. THAT BEING SAID: Anne, I have high expectations for you, I am not going to take it easy on you. You better bring tears to my tear-ductless eyes.
Amanda Seyfried -- I think there is someone better out there to play Cosette. Yeah. I think she's over rated, The only part she's ever played that I thought was funny was Karen Smith in Mean Girls. But that's about it. I think she's okay, but in a movie THIS powerful, they needed someone a little less... "cute" and a little more... er... talented. Sorry Amanda, you're cute and I love you, but there's got to be someone better. I will however, have a WHOLE NEW level of respect for her if she kicks a** in her role as Cosette.
Russel Crowe-- Javert: Russel Crowe. High high high high high expectations. Will destroy him if he blows this. Nuff' said.
Samantha Barks - Eponine --> Yeah I actually have no idea who this is. All I have to say, is that she has big a** shoes to fill, and if she doesn't... I'm going to hunt her down and demand a refilm.
Helena Bonham Carter as Madame Thenardier: YAY. I have no doubts she is going to nail this. Helena is fricking crazy face but this isn't a Tim Burton film (respect) so I think she's really going to branch out into awesomeness in this role. Helena, don't let me down and make me look like an idiot girl!
And that beautiful little child Isabelle Allen, playing little Cosette: Better bring f***ing tears. She's freaking adorable in appearance. "Castle on a Cloud" better make me weep. Break a Leg little one!
So yeah. That's how that is going down. I better be morbidly impressed or someone is going to get angry phone calls from me. Then I will go through the phone like the girl on the ring in a tv (terrible movie btdubs) and kill them and suck their souls. Then go in my well and cry. So yeah. Don't disappoint me Hollywood. Or sh**... will go the eff down.
Stay Classy, GO SEE THIS EFFING MOVIE.
J.Ellen
Monday, October 29, 2012
Things that are not okay
1. Fat Remarks: It is NOT okay to make sly remarks about people that are bigger than you. You don't know their body, you don't know them, so back off. If a big girl wants to eat a cheeseburger, then let her eat the f***ing cheeseburger NO ONE asked you, and it's not hurting you.
2. Gay Remarks: Again, not hurting you. So shush. No one cares and you look ignorant 99% of the time when you talk about it. I have yet to hear an intelligent anti-gay marriage argument.
3. Religion Remarks: Just, shut up. This old battle between religious/non-religious people is so unbelievably old and I just.. don't care. So don't talk to me about it unless you have something intelligent to say.
Stay Classy, and Be. Nice.
J.Ellen
2. Gay Remarks: Again, not hurting you. So shush. No one cares and you look ignorant 99% of the time when you talk about it. I have yet to hear an intelligent anti-gay marriage argument.
3. Religion Remarks: Just, shut up. This old battle between religious/non-religious people is so unbelievably old and I just.. don't care. So don't talk to me about it unless you have something intelligent to say.
Stay Classy, and Be. Nice.
J.Ellen
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Weird Fears and Non-Fears
FEAR: Haunted Houses. Never again. Almost peed my pants.
FEAR: Things getting in my eyes. Escalator tread, pieces of wood from wood flooring (probably the biggest one) bird feet, you name it.
NON-FEAR Huge and Small spiders. If they are tarantulas or babies I don't care
it's the medium sized ones that scare me
FEAR Losing my hearing/sight/smell/taste/touch etc etc
FEAR Heights
NON FEAR flying/falling with style... makes no sense I know.
And avengers sh** to brighten your day
FEAR: Things getting in my eyes. Escalator tread, pieces of wood from wood flooring (probably the biggest one) bird feet, you name it.
NON-FEAR Huge and Small spiders. If they are tarantulas or babies I don't care
it's the medium sized ones that scare me
FEAR Losing my hearing/sight/smell/taste/touch etc etc
FEAR Heights
NON FEAR flying/falling with style... makes no sense I know.
And avengers sh** to brighten your day
Dumb thing a person once asked about the Avengers movie: "Why isn't Batman and Supergirl in this movie?"
Reasons this is a stupid question:
1.) Your grammar sucks. Aren't* You are referring to more than one person... Aren't*
2.) Batman is a DC comic, not a Marvel comic... idiot.
3.) There is no such significant thing as "Supergirl" Wonder Woman you noob.
Stay Classy, J.Ellen
America's Next Top Model
I wanna be a high-fashion model,
so fricking bad,
be in pictures with things I'll never have..
Wanna be on the cover of Vogue magazine,
smiling next to Vera and Valentiiiiin-(o)
Here's the thing... I can't model because I'm too short. But that makes no sense. My height (5'4") is the EXACT median height for women... so I represent women as a whole, therefore I am a much better estimation as to what the clothing will look like. Just saying, they should let me be a model. Or at least... get coffee for models... or treat their blisters... sad I know. It's desperation what can I say?
so fricking bad,
be in pictures with things I'll never have..
Wanna be on the cover of Vogue magazine,
smiling next to Vera and Valentiiiiin-(o)
Here's the thing... I can't model because I'm too short. But that makes no sense. My height (5'4") is the EXACT median height for women... so I represent women as a whole, therefore I am a much better estimation as to what the clothing will look like. Just saying, they should let me be a model. Or at least... get coffee for models... or treat their blisters... sad I know. It's desperation what can I say?
Thursday, October 25, 2012
People say RANDOM shiz
Okay, so ever since I've been at BYU, people have just out of no where been saying the most RANDOM things about me and to me. Here are a couple examples that I thought you'd find amusing.
1: So I'm walking up the hellish, long, uphill ramp connecting my dorm complex to the main campus where classes are, minding my own short little obviously a freshman business, when some guy going the opposite direction says "whoa. you have really big ears." excuse me... what? Where did ... what the.. I don't .. even.. .whatever
Thank you Captain Obvious, do you want a prize? Yes, my ears are awfully large and stick out quite significantly, however... why would say that to a random stranger? XD haha, anywho. congrats to him on his observation skills, I happen to love my ears thank you very much.
2. "haha, her legs are really white." T_T No. Sh**. Sherlock. That's like walking up to a black person and being like "whoa, you're legs are really dark." Well no duh you moron, I'm really pale, blonde and blue eyed. My legs aren't going to look all snooki n' sh** okay?
<--felt about like this
2a. I go to a school where shorts have to go down to your f***ing knees. I am not about to wear 35 mom with 4 kids shorts at 18 thank you very much, so I wear skinny jeans almost everyday, my legs haven't gotten sun for like two months. Back off barbie. 2b. you caught me on the way to the all women's workout room. I'm not going to put on tanner sh** to go work out in a nasty sweaty room full of nasty sweaty women. No thank you. 2c. I was going to the gym, you were going to the cafeteria, you are not allowed to judge me
Anyway, I just those were funnay and exceedingly random
Stay Classy,
J.Ellen
1: So I'm walking up the hellish, long, uphill ramp connecting my dorm complex to the main campus where classes are, minding my own short little obviously a freshman business, when some guy going the opposite direction says "whoa. you have really big ears." excuse me... what? Where did ... what the.. I don't .. even.. .whatever
Thank you Captain Obvious, do you want a prize? Yes, my ears are awfully large and stick out quite significantly, however... why would say that to a random stranger? XD haha, anywho. congrats to him on his observation skills, I happen to love my ears thank you very much.
2. "haha, her legs are really white." T_T No. Sh**. Sherlock. That's like walking up to a black person and being like "whoa, you're legs are really dark." Well no duh you moron, I'm really pale, blonde and blue eyed. My legs aren't going to look all snooki n' sh** okay?
<--felt about like this2a. I go to a school where shorts have to go down to your f***ing knees. I am not about to wear 35 mom with 4 kids shorts at 18 thank you very much, so I wear skinny jeans almost everyday, my legs haven't gotten sun for like two months. Back off barbie. 2b. you caught me on the way to the all women's workout room. I'm not going to put on tanner sh** to go work out in a nasty sweaty room full of nasty sweaty women. No thank you. 2c. I was going to the gym, you were going to the cafeteria, you are not allowed to judge me
Anyway, I just those were funnay and exceedingly random
Stay Classy,
J.Ellen
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Songs full of sh** part 2
On a lighter note, his sweater looks comfy.
Stay Classy, Stay Honest
J.Ellen
Tips and Mind tricks / K.Stew Continewed
So I've drastically changed my eating habits. I used to just eat whatever the frick I wanted, and I started on the path of the dreaded freshman fifteen. My love handles got weirder and I was like meh. Do want to sleep. (hey hey by the way... curves are sexy... I just get them in ALL the wrong places.) and I was like what the... so yeah. It's only been three days but here are a couple tips and tricks I've picked up:
unhealthy foods: Tell yourself LATER not NEVER. You can eat it later. 7th day my friends, 7th day. If you can live through six days of vegetables and sadness, you can eat what you like on the 7th. If you say "never" you'll always fail.
second, don't say "I can't eat that" say, "I don't eat that" saying "can't" makes you feel like you're missing out; "don't" does make you sound pretentious, but you're tricking your brain into positive thinking. i.e. Vegetarians. Used to be one. Had to stop because I had an iron deficiency. But, I succeeded for a YEAR because it's not that I couldn't eat meat... but I DIDN'T eat meat.
The bet: I hate spending money, those of you who've read the rest of the blog know this, so I made a bet. Everytime I eat extra sweet treats, I have to pay my friend Rachel 5 dollars and eventually give up my favorite sweatpants (Uhm. NO. Not happening) So, more incentive to do this for a month!
Okay on to bigger and better things that don't make me want to binge on cookies and nutella:
Let's discuss one of my fave people in the world of acting: K.Stew. (Kristen Stewart if you're a dumba** and couldn't figure that out) I mentioned her briefly in my post about twilight (referred to as "pants" courtesy of theoatmeal.com. brilliant website by the way, visit it if you are not a boring, humorless prude... or prepare to be insulted if you are) But I just REALLY want to DIG INTO the deep world of magic of K.Stew.
First of all,what is this face. Is she capable of ANYTHING but this face? I think not:
Some K.Stew memes that deeply touch my heart.. or my spleen... whatever:
unhealthy foods: Tell yourself LATER not NEVER. You can eat it later. 7th day my friends, 7th day. If you can live through six days of vegetables and sadness, you can eat what you like on the 7th. If you say "never" you'll always fail.
second, don't say "I can't eat that" say, "I don't eat that" saying "can't" makes you feel like you're missing out; "don't" does make you sound pretentious, but you're tricking your brain into positive thinking. i.e. Vegetarians. Used to be one. Had to stop because I had an iron deficiency. But, I succeeded for a YEAR because it's not that I couldn't eat meat... but I DIDN'T eat meat.
The bet: I hate spending money, those of you who've read the rest of the blog know this, so I made a bet. Everytime I eat extra sweet treats, I have to pay my friend Rachel 5 dollars and eventually give up my favorite sweatpants (Uhm. NO. Not happening) So, more incentive to do this for a month!
Okay on to bigger and better things that don't make me want to binge on cookies and nutella:
Let's discuss one of my fave people in the world of acting: K.Stew. (Kristen Stewart if you're a dumba** and couldn't figure that out) I mentioned her briefly in my post about twilight (referred to as "pants" courtesy of theoatmeal.com. brilliant website by the way, visit it if you are not a boring, humorless prude... or prepare to be insulted if you are) But I just REALLY want to DIG INTO the deep world of magic of K.Stew.
First of all,what is this face. Is she capable of ANYTHING but this face? I think not:
I'm just pointing this out
I just don't understand a.) the attraction b.) how she got jobs ever. Snow White and the huntsmen... was just uncomfortable. I was like I can't even focus on what is going on right now because I'm distracted by Kristen Stewart in a BAD way. I'm just hurt and confused and troubled deeply by this idea that she CANNOT play anyone but herself. WHY do people like her if I have never believed a SINGLE role she has played. Feel free to comment and explain the attraction to K.Stew. Also, she cheated on Robert Pattinson. What. The. Eff. Is. Wrong. With. You? Oh that's right, you're the ever encompassing pants that anyone can put themselves into. Makes sense.Some K.Stew memes that deeply touch my heart.. or my spleen... whatever:
Lazy A** Texters/Typers/Stuff About Life/Other... sh**
It does NOT take that long to slip your little finger to the shift key to capitalize "I" and "I'm" ... we all get lazy but every. single. time? really?
It does NOT take that long to learn the difference between you're and your.
You're = you are --> You're an idiot.
Your = possession --> Your parents were idiots for not using a condom.
lmao ... lmao... LI-MAUUU! I just always want to say that out loud like a crazy person when I read that sh**. Heh.
There, their, and they're.
They're = They are --> They're saggy idiots
Their = possession --> Their parents were idiots for still not using a condom
There = a place --> There are free condoms over there, don't be an idiot, use one. Don't repeat your parents mistakes.
Happenings in life and such and such and pictures and gifs and good things:
It does NOT take that long to learn the difference between you're and your.
You're = you are --> You're an idiot.
Your = possession --> Your parents were idiots for not using a condom.
lmao ... lmao... LI-MAUUU! I just always want to say that out loud like a crazy person when I read that sh**. Heh.
There, their, and they're.
They're = They are --> They're saggy idiots
Their = possession --> Their parents were idiots for still not using a condom
There = a place --> There are free condoms over there, don't be an idiot, use one. Don't repeat your parents mistakes.
Happenings in life and such and such and pictures and gifs and good things:
How I feel about Exams:
How I feel about college:
How I feel about being an adult:
How I feel about having to shave my legs:
How I feel about filling out a FAFSA... Again
How I feel about LES MIS COMING OUT IN DECEMBER WITH HUGH JACKMAN
How I feel about people referring to me as "Beth's Roommate" (I love you Beth. This just needed to be on here.)
So yeah... that's pretty much my life at the moment.
Stay Classy, You're a human, and your life depends on it
(see what I did there? Sons of the Pharaoh and their sisters! They're the correct forms of your and you're! I did it again! And again... and again... and again...)
J.Ellen
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Day 2 -- Boys and their food
It's only for a month it's only for a month it's only for a month
SERIOUSLY. I WANT CAKE AND FRIES AND CAKE AND MINT BROWNIES AND MINT BROWNIES AND FRIES AND SH**. GUYS. we can do this. We can do this. One month. Just ooonnnne baaaabby little month.
Why is this so hard?
1.) I'm f***ing starving.
2.) Salad tastes like sh** after you eat after every meal
3.)Sweet treats/ all things delicious are so hard to resist
4.) GOSHDARNEFFINGMOTHERFATHERING BOYS.
I see these boys, muscled, lovely, tall thin atheltic...et effing cetera... and they are eating a cheeseburger with fries, a pasta dish smothered in cheese, effing pork chops with sauce and sh** a large overflowing salad covered in cheesy dressing deliciousness, ALL the desserts available, some crepes, soup, mini pizzas and chocolate milk. F*** YOU. That is why this is so darn hard. Because they have EVERYTHING I want to be eating on their plates and the cafeteria type place here. You pay one fee and eat whatever you want. I'm like mm. Dressingless, cheeseless, interesting toppingless salad.Yummo. FALSE. Why were girls screwed with this baby making sh** where we have to be fat in order to satisfy the needs of caveman God, yet supposed to be thin for society? What is that?! While guys don't have baby birthing pains and periods (WHOA I SAID THE P WORD... Penis. I SAID THE OTHER ONE. get over it.) and can eat whateveeer they want. I call BS on that and it is unfair.
Anyway, stay strong my friends! 1 day, 3 weeks 6 days. Remember, this will get easier becuase our bodies will stop craving the CRAP it's used to receiving! Then we will feel healthy and strong! Or... something like that... I think.
Stay Classy, and always be sarcastically tastefully offensive,
J.Ellen
SERIOUSLY. I WANT CAKE AND FRIES AND CAKE AND MINT BROWNIES AND MINT BROWNIES AND FRIES AND SH**. GUYS. we can do this. We can do this. One month. Just ooonnnne baaaabby little month.
Why is this so hard?
1.) I'm f***ing starving.
2.) Salad tastes like sh** after you eat after every meal
3.)Sweet treats/ all things delicious are so hard to resist
4.) GOSHDARNEFFINGMOTHERFATHERING BOYS.
I see these boys, muscled, lovely, tall thin atheltic...et effing cetera... and they are eating a cheeseburger with fries, a pasta dish smothered in cheese, effing pork chops with sauce and sh** a large overflowing salad covered in cheesy dressing deliciousness, ALL the desserts available, some crepes, soup, mini pizzas and chocolate milk. F*** YOU. That is why this is so darn hard. Because they have EVERYTHING I want to be eating on their plates and the cafeteria type place here. You pay one fee and eat whatever you want. I'm like mm. Dressingless, cheeseless, interesting toppingless salad.Yummo. FALSE. Why were girls screwed with this baby making sh** where we have to be fat in order to satisfy the needs of caveman God, yet supposed to be thin for society? What is that?! While guys don't have baby birthing pains and periods (WHOA I SAID THE P WORD... Penis. I SAID THE OTHER ONE. get over it.) and can eat whateveeer they want. I call BS on that and it is unfair.
Anyway, stay strong my friends! 1 day, 3 weeks 6 days. Remember, this will get easier becuase our bodies will stop craving the CRAP it's used to receiving! Then we will feel healthy and strong! Or... something like that... I think.
Stay Classy, and always be sarcastically tastefully offensive,
J.Ellen
Saturday, October 20, 2012
Buttspirations and Saddlebags
I hate working out, I hate salad, I love all things delicious and wonderful. My abusive relationship is with cheeseburgers and pizza and cake and cookies and brownies (mint brownies... YUM) etc etc etc... oh and french fries. HOWEVER, I have the metabolism of a 55 year old balding man with a beer belly, so it's time to make some changes. It's HARD for me to stick to healthy eating and exercise habits... f*** you I like ice cream, don't judge me.
Urgh... so yeah, here's my one of my many buttspirations. What is a buttspiration? A butt that I want mine to look like, an inspiration for my butt. Yep. Whatever. Enough with the judgment, read the blog.
I am going to commit, just for one month to eat really healthy and exercise regularly. Long term goals don't work, mini goals do. Just one month. To keep myself motivated, I am going to post a before and after picture at the end of the month, whether or not I succeed. This will make me do SOMETHING so I don't embarrass myself at the end of the month. I encourage you to do it with me! Don't eat too much or too little, go for brisk walks four times a week, and have 1 cookie instead of 6. (yep this happens a lot) So yeah, sorry but I'm basically forcing you to be the motivation for me to work out, because if I promise to post photos on November 18 (four weeks from now), which I'm doing, I want to post results haha because right now... yeah whoops. My mid section is slowly expanding and I'm pretty sure my BMI has increased by like 3%... D*** YOU GENETICS AND YOUR SLOW METABOLISM... Trust me, if I can do this, so you can you! I hatttteeee exercising and I like sweets more than anyone I know, if I can do this just for a month, you can do it to. I refuse to someday be on the biggest loser... because, quite frankly, Jillian Michaels scares the sh** out of me.
As for the before and after photos, they will be posted on November 18, I made sure the "before" photos were super horrible phone in a bathroom mirror quality and I made sure to puff my tummy out as much as possible and look super sad ;) you know... like those acne commericals where they're like "HOLY SH**! LOOK AT UNICORN POO FACIAL SCRUB AND HOW WELL IT WORKED FOR MARYANNE, FORT MOODLES, WISCONSIN 24! RESULTS NOT F***ING TYPICAL.
and in the before picture, they look a little like the joker had offspring with hydra from Captain America, and in the after picture they look like Julianne Hough after a nice facial from the Haus of Gaga
yep. going for that effect for added humor.
For Comic Relief on the Matter:
HOW DIETS WORK WITH JENNA MARBLES
Urgh... so yeah, here's my one of my many buttspirations. What is a buttspiration? A butt that I want mine to look like, an inspiration for my butt. Yep. Whatever. Enough with the judgment, read the blog.
I am going to commit, just for one month to eat really healthy and exercise regularly. Long term goals don't work, mini goals do. Just one month. To keep myself motivated, I am going to post a before and after picture at the end of the month, whether or not I succeed. This will make me do SOMETHING so I don't embarrass myself at the end of the month. I encourage you to do it with me! Don't eat too much or too little, go for brisk walks four times a week, and have 1 cookie instead of 6. (yep this happens a lot) So yeah, sorry but I'm basically forcing you to be the motivation for me to work out, because if I promise to post photos on November 18 (four weeks from now), which I'm doing, I want to post results haha because right now... yeah whoops. My mid section is slowly expanding and I'm pretty sure my BMI has increased by like 3%... D*** YOU GENETICS AND YOUR SLOW METABOLISM... Trust me, if I can do this, so you can you! I hatttteeee exercising and I like sweets more than anyone I know, if I can do this just for a month, you can do it to. I refuse to someday be on the biggest loser... because, quite frankly, Jillian Michaels scares the sh** out of me.
As for the before and after photos, they will be posted on November 18, I made sure the "before" photos were super horrible phone in a bathroom mirror quality and I made sure to puff my tummy out as much as possible and look super sad ;) you know... like those acne commericals where they're like "HOLY SH**! LOOK AT UNICORN POO FACIAL SCRUB AND HOW WELL IT WORKED FOR MARYANNE, FORT MOODLES, WISCONSIN 24! RESULTS NOT F***ING TYPICAL.
and in the before picture, they look a little like the joker had offspring with hydra from Captain America, and in the after picture they look like Julianne Hough after a nice facial from the Haus of Gaga
yep. going for that effect for added humor.
For Comic Relief on the Matter:
HOW DIETS WORK WITH JENNA MARBLES
Amen Jenna, you've figured this out better than anyone could put into words. Jenna is my homegirl. I adore her. And she's hilarious. Her and I have the same effing sense of humor. Unfortunately, it's adding to my freshman fifteen because I sit on youtube and watch her sh**. Whatever, it's funny. She's also my buttspiration.
Starting at: 132 lbs and 24% BMI (whoopsies)
Starting at: 132 lbs and 24% BMI (whoopsies)
FIGHT THE FRESHMAN FIFTEEN WITH A VENGEANCE!
Stay Classy, Get fit,
J.Ellen
P.s. as extra motivation, I until November 18, I have to pay Rachel 5$ for every sweet treat I eat (with the exception of halloween... because then I can eat whatever I want) up to 20$ and then I have to pay her SIX $ for every sweet treat AND give her my favorite lazy time sweatpants. No way am I losing those!!! Or money for that matter... I like money.
P.s. as extra motivation, I until November 18, I have to pay Rachel 5$ for every sweet treat I eat (with the exception of halloween... because then I can eat whatever I want) up to 20$ and then I have to pay her SIX $ for every sweet treat AND give her my favorite lazy time sweatpants. No way am I losing those!!! Or money for that matter... I like money.
Friday, October 19, 2012
Marriage and Bad Photo Editing
So uhm. BYU took things a SMIDGE too far and placed these free bridal magazines. F***ing everywhere. EVERYWHERE. ALL the places. I'm thinking, okay okay... I get it. You want us to date other mormons. But I mean, there's a whole stack of them next to a freshman dorm... Sometimes when we're bored we find late night couples making out and either wish the sprinklers would hurry up and turn on or we give them bridal magazine just to be a pain in the a**. The guys always think it's funny, and the girls never do... huh.. topic for another post... anyway... So I'm relatively bitter about marriages. HOLY SH**?! A mormon at BYU who doesn't want to get MARRIED?! I know. I've also half-a** sworn repeatedly throughout this blog. Whatever. #rebellife #duckface #justkidding-I'd never say any of that and be serious.. ANYWAY: AHEM: So marriage to me is an ancient institution that has become a show of how nice your a** is and how much money you can spend. It seems silly to me that's all. So sue me.
Second first-world-problem being embraced here: Bad Photo editing. There are more than enough technologies that this should be unacceptable... I would have worsened this by using comic sans but it was not available on this sh** website. Note my use of stickers and lack of actually centering the photo... so much cleverness. *Again* my built in camera sucks: Not my fault*** So this is a shout out to all this photo editing crap that looks like a dora the explorer plastic backpack that was thrown up on by the wal-mart craft section... this needs to stop:
Second first-world-problem being embraced here: Bad Photo editing. There are more than enough technologies that this should be unacceptable... I would have worsened this by using comic sans but it was not available on this sh** website. Note my use of stickers and lack of actually centering the photo... so much cleverness. *Again* my built in camera sucks: Not my fault*** So this is a shout out to all this photo editing crap that looks like a dora the explorer plastic backpack that was thrown up on by the wal-mart craft section... this needs to stop:
I'm a f***ing artist. My hand drawn fire and little jelly bean minion are my pride and glory for this photo. I also made a sad face to speak to your emotions. Is it working?
Stay Classy, and for pete's sake enough live laugh love snuggles n' sh**
J.Ellen
The Avengers and My True Love
So everyone who knows me well enough that'd I call them my friend knows that I have a slight obsession with The Avengers/Captain America. (Slight meaning, I'm pretty sure Kerri and I both saw it in theaters four times... whoopsies.) I'm pretty sure Chris Evans and I are soulmates and meant to be in love with each other forever in a polygamous relationship with my best friend and platonic soulmate, Kerri.
How I show people at college how I feel about being forever alone on a friday, watching these movies of beauty instead of being as social as I could be...
How I show people at college how I feel about being forever alone on a friday, watching these movies of beauty instead of being as social as I could be...
* dislaimer * I know the quality is sh**. That is because my webcam is sh**. First world problems. Deal with it.
HOW I ACTUALLY FEEL AND HOW MY BEAUTIFUL MAINE FRIENDS KNOW AND UNDERSTAND ME TO BE.
This should be a f***ing meme. Priceless. Love.
Stay... Classy.
J.Ellen.
P.S. DVD's lovely presents from Rachel from Maine/Ohio... Thanks Rachel!
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Buyers Regret/Remorse
I have the worst case of buyers regret/remorse. I hate spending money, I absolutely hate it. Every single time I buy something, I have to convince myself it was a good purchase, and then ask a friend if my purchase was a good one. (It's usually my dear friend Kerri who has to convince me that it's okay to buy things. I'm sorry my dearest friend.)
For example, I absolutely love the graphic novel, "Blankets" by Craig Thompson. It receive mixed reviews, but overall, I really really really enjoyed it. Growing up in a highly religious family, and trying to make my own way in this world, I was able to connect with Thompson, as well as other aspects of the book that made me break down in tears thinking about my own past experiences. And I don't cry at anything, not at the titanic, not at the fricking notebook, not when my grandma died etc etc. I didn't cry, at all. Yet, somehow, this book touched me in such a way that I almost had to stop reading because I was sobbing. Pathetic, I know. The only other time I cried this hard was when I found out my horse was going blind in one eye and I was sobbing backstage during my high school's production of "Kate" and I was "Kate" and everyone was telling me to STAHP because I was screwing my stage make-up... up.
Anyway, you get that I REALLY like this book, but it usually goes for about flipping 30$ for a paper back so I never bought it. Well I found it on Amazon for 10 and almost freaked out and bought it. Immediately afterward I felt awful for wasting money on this book and I'm still convincing myself it was a good idea.
So I've made some rules/justifications to help those with buyer's regret:
*If you will used it less than four times a year (once every three months) you don't need it. If you will, it was a good purchase.
*If it is a seasonal purchase you will use every single year at that season, it was an okay purchase
*If you will wear it at least 1-2 times a month it was a good purchase
*If it is a timeless decoration that you will use continuously it is a good purchase. If your object falls under these categories, it was NOT a good purchase: 70's, disco themed, twilight themed, Dawson's Creek themed, Kristen Stewart and non-parody themed, or contains anything with Michael Vick or Sarah Jessica Parker on it.
Now I feel good about my life...
For example, I absolutely love the graphic novel, "Blankets" by Craig Thompson. It receive mixed reviews, but overall, I really really really enjoyed it. Growing up in a highly religious family, and trying to make my own way in this world, I was able to connect with Thompson, as well as other aspects of the book that made me break down in tears thinking about my own past experiences. And I don't cry at anything, not at the titanic, not at the fricking notebook, not when my grandma died etc etc. I didn't cry, at all. Yet, somehow, this book touched me in such a way that I almost had to stop reading because I was sobbing. Pathetic, I know. The only other time I cried this hard was when I found out my horse was going blind in one eye and I was sobbing backstage during my high school's production of "Kate" and I was "Kate" and everyone was telling me to STAHP because I was screwing my stage make-up... up.
Anyway, you get that I REALLY like this book, but it usually goes for about flipping 30$ for a paper back so I never bought it. Well I found it on Amazon for 10 and almost freaked out and bought it. Immediately afterward I felt awful for wasting money on this book and I'm still convincing myself it was a good idea.
So I've made some rules/justifications to help those with buyer's regret:
*If you will used it less than four times a year (once every three months) you don't need it. If you will, it was a good purchase.
*If it is a seasonal purchase you will use every single year at that season, it was an okay purchase
*If you will wear it at least 1-2 times a month it was a good purchase
*If it is a timeless decoration that you will use continuously it is a good purchase. If your object falls under these categories, it was NOT a good purchase: 70's, disco themed, twilight themed, Dawson's Creek themed, Kristen Stewart and non-parody themed, or contains anything with Michael Vick or Sarah Jessica Parker on it.
Now I feel good about my life...
Monday, October 15, 2012
Hypo-crazy
Everyone can be hypocritical at times. However, these are just some of my personal faves when it comes to hypocrisy
People who are against gay marriage, but watch lesbian porn, like watching girls make-out... etc etc etc
People who are against gay marriage, but are adamant that cultures with arranged marriages are immoral. So it's wrong to force people to get married and they should be able to marry for love if they choose, but when two people do fall in love they shouldn't be able to? What?! This literally makes no sense.
People who click likes all over facebook about anti-bullying and RIP so and so but don't stop their friends from being total jerks to other people at school and such
People who say Top Model is stupid and take 2985798754398574 pictures of themselves.*
*Never insult Tyra Banks in front of me.
People who cheat. Don't say "I luuuv you" and sleep around. False. Doucheberry.
Fit people who complain about fat, cellulite, etc in front of me. I want to live my life and eat my cheeseburgers. F*** you.
People who are against gay marriage, but watch lesbian porn, like watching girls make-out... etc etc etc
People who are against gay marriage, but are adamant that cultures with arranged marriages are immoral. So it's wrong to force people to get married and they should be able to marry for love if they choose, but when two people do fall in love they shouldn't be able to? What?! This literally makes no sense.
People who click likes all over facebook about anti-bullying and RIP so and so but don't stop their friends from being total jerks to other people at school and such
People who say Top Model is stupid and take 2985798754398574 pictures of themselves.*
*Never insult Tyra Banks in front of me.
People who cheat. Don't say "I luuuv you" and sleep around. False. Doucheberry.
Fit people who complain about fat, cellulite, etc in front of me. I want to live my life and eat my cheeseburgers. F*** you.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
UGLY. IS. JUST. FINE.
So girls have this thing where they just... can't be ugly. (wow... groundbreaking.) I get up and pick out these stupid little outfits and do my hair and make-up and sh** but what I'm talking about is picture taking. WHY do we always feel the need to stare at the camera with a fake-a** smile?! Necessary?! I think no. And if they take an "ugly" picture... it's like... wow, I'm glaring at the camera kind of sexually... how ugly T_T... I was thinking ugly more like this:
(insert choice adjectives) ex-boyfriend on the left right here. awesome kid from school here.
There. That's much better. (ain't I a beauty?) Yes. This is me. ^^^Did I untag this photo? F&$% NO. I don't look like this all the time, so why should I be ashamed that I can manipulate my face and not be like look at this totes awesome picture of me standing in the SAME POSITION I ALWAYS STAND IN BECAUSE IT MAKES MY A** LOOK BETTER. <-- totally do this. I have girls take "ugly" pictures and then REFUSE to keep them ANYWHERE in technological existence. I'm like, if everyone KNOWS you're not trying to be pretty, why try so darn hard? NO ONE CARES. Why do we feel the need to stand in an awkward line with fake smiles. Why? just... no.
Embrace yo Ugly Face, Stay Classy
J.Ellen
(insert choice adjectives) ex-boyfriend on the left right here. awesome kid from school here.
Embrace yo Ugly Face, Stay Classy
J.Ellen
Thursday, October 11, 2012
The Presidential Debate
I'm not going to bore you with my political perspectives because quite frankly my dear, you probably don't give a damn. But I do have a few things to say about the debate. If you're looking for a controversial political argument about Romney hugging and Obama snuggling... you're in the wrong place. This is more of a debate skills critique.
A Previous Facebook Status:
"Juliet was THIRTEEN. THIRTEEN years old... When I was thirteen, I was crossing my fingers that there were pizza nuggets for lunch..." -- JennaMarbles on Romeo and Juliet. Well said my friend. And on that fun note: The debate. First off, BOTH candidates need to check their facts before their mouth opens like an old band-aid on Girls Gone Wild. They both made wrong accusations and factual mistakes.
A Previous Facebook Status:
"Juliet was THIRTEEN. THIRTEEN years old... When I was thirteen, I was crossing my fingers that there were pizza nuggets for lunch..." -- JennaMarbles on Romeo and Juliet. Well said my friend. And on that fun note: The debate. First off, BOTH candidates need to check their facts before their mouth opens like an old band-aid on Girls Gone Wild. They both made wrong accusations and factual mistakes.
Secondly, if you go in thinking "Romney is a scum-sucking money hoarder" or "Obama is a tax vampire who feeds on the souls who made something of themselves in this country" You are literally getting NOTHING out of the debate. I'm not saying you shouldn't have an opinion, because that would be completely and utterly stupid. I'm saying that, regardless of who you think you're voting for, you should go into debates with an open mind and genuinely listen to each candidate. Otherwise, I don't want to hear any more about Romney's tax return, or Obama's birth certificate or Michelle's pencil skirts or how if Romney wins, we'll have sexiest VP in United States history. Okay? Okay.
I just wanted to elaborate on this and say that I was personally not impressed by either candidate at the debate. Obama... I don't even really know what you were trying to say because you were saying the ame thing repeatedly and whatever I don't even... No I just can't. Romney... Stahp. The interrupting is not only rude but distracting. Both of you: THERE ARE MORE THINGS TO THIS COUNTRY THAN TAXES. Yes, this is an issue, raising income over expenses IS important however, I DO NOT want to hear this stupid middle school girl middle class taxation argument. One sentence summary: Neither of you want to f*** with the middle class. the end. stop trying to blame each other for things neither of you are stupid enough to actually plan on doing... or at least I hope not... Oh dear.
Another debate critique: Enough with the personal propaganda stories! "I knew a woman... in Northern Wisconsin..." Excuse me? I don't care. Sorry random woman from N. Wisconsin. Everyone who's ever seen He's Just Not That Into You, or you know.. has A BRAIN knows that there are rules... and there are exceptions. How do we know if Mary Jane O'Connor Parzynockova III, a transvestite from St Louis, is a rule or an exception? (Rock on Mary Jane) Okay? so enough. I'm not trying to sound like a Utilitarian, but in this sense, you DO need to do the most good for the most amount of people. Your points may have been valid, but I'm too distracted by Bob Bellington Total Pants from Kansas and his smelting business to know what you're REALLY getting at... because you run out of effing time before you finish talking about how you're going to help the GREATEST AMOUNG of Bob Bellingtons in this country.
I'm me and I don't give a flying piece of sweet pork in space if anyone approves this message.
Tastefully Offensive, Stay Classy
J.Ellen
A Brief Introduction To Rant One
You may not like Harry Potter or The Hunger Games... but this is still funny.
Rant Number One: Twilight
I can't start a blog about ranting and my odd sense of humor without addressing my totes fave subject... The Twilight Saga. (For those who don't know me, when I say "totes fave" I'm about as serious as Paris Hilton talking about politics.)
First off, the title. What the .... Okay. Saga? really? Literature of this quality has not earned the grand title and esteem that comes with the word... "Saga" I don't about you but when I think Saga, I think brave heroics and mind boggling interesting so and so's... not pants.
Pants? Why pants? Because of the oatmeal. That's why. (Wow, this chick is really not making any sense.) Let me explain. For those of you not acquainted with theoatmeal.com ... get acquainted. He refers to Bella Swan as pants because she literally is a pair of pants that any Teenage girl, bored housewife, lady with a beard etc. can stuff her love handles into. She's clumsy, she's awkward, yet this "perfect" vampire is madly in love with this random pair of pants with no refining or defining qualities. Fricking pants.
Second: Bella is whiny lil' biiiiee****** etc.. (note my choice of font and highlighting colors here...ew)"Oh my gosh, I'm clumsy and I miss Pheonix -- whine and moan etc..." Look fille, I moved from Arizona to flipping Maine, and it was -40 degrees and -55 with the wind chill. Silence. No one cares. I can hear crickets singing in my brain already. You could've moved to Florida buuut you didn't. Because you are pants. New Moon: Okay. Any girl who says she has never been upset over a boy, is lying her lil tush off. However, most of us don't sit in a circulating room staring out the fricking window for months at a time. "Oh my gosh he left me, I'm so alone blah di blah di blah." False. What are you... why ...? No. If this were real life, he'd be banging a barmaid somewhere in New Mexico, okay? (Props to the barmaid... dang.) Get over it, there is a shirtless and beautiful man who will gladly take care of this problem. And I'm as much of an adrenaline junkie as the next guy, but seriously... just stop. Attention. Whore.
All right, my personal favorite topic. Does anyone really not notice how F***ED UP AND NOT OKAY their relationship is?!?! Here's a story: Once upon a time there was an insecure teenage girl (wow... original) and a much older man. He would sneak into her room at night and stare at her while she slept. He then murders people in front of her. He then abandons her and goes to Italy and comes back as soon as she starts to move on with her life and continues to stalk her. He then gets her involved in his gang warfare and then proposes to her. She gets married fresh out of high school and get pregnant. He then proceeds to hate the fetus and later pulls it out of her with his teeth (DAFUQ?!) and kills her and turns her into a flesheating monster. THE END! Wasn't that romantic?!
Why is she like okay, there's a strange boy in my room. I think I'll make out with him and trace my fingers over his perfect chest. FALSE. what what what are you doing? I'd be like excuse me, pepper spray and a shotgun. Yeeaaah...
So that's that.
You know, minus the lack of historical accuracy, historical interest, terrible plot driven nothingness, lack of character development, lack of adjectives other than "perfect" and "beautiful" etc. etc. you get the point. Oh and K.Stew. My totes fave... K.Stew. No really. She was even better in Snow White. T_T
Taylor Lautner on the other hand... holy shiiiitake mushrooms. Break me off a piece of THAT sexy Kit Kat bar. Acting... not so much. Body... Yes please. Face...
Robert Pattinson -- I actually like as an actor. Just not in twilight because uhm... well he looks like he has to urinate throughout the entire film. There is a difference between restraining the want to eat someone (also fricking creepy) and restraining an overly full bladder.
First off, the title. What the .... Okay. Saga? really? Literature of this quality has not earned the grand title and esteem that comes with the word... "Saga" I don't about you but when I think Saga, I think brave heroics and mind boggling interesting so and so's... not pants.
Pants? Why pants? Because of the oatmeal. That's why. (Wow, this chick is really not making any sense.) Let me explain. For those of you not acquainted with theoatmeal.com ... get acquainted. He refers to Bella Swan as pants because she literally is a pair of pants that any Teenage girl, bored housewife, lady with a beard etc. can stuff her love handles into. She's clumsy, she's awkward, yet this "perfect" vampire is madly in love with this random pair of pants with no refining or defining qualities. Fricking pants.
Second: Bella is whiny lil' biiiiee****** etc.. (note my choice of font and highlighting colors here...ew)"Oh my gosh, I'm clumsy and I miss Pheonix -- whine and moan etc..." Look fille, I moved from Arizona to flipping Maine, and it was -40 degrees and -55 with the wind chill. Silence. No one cares. I can hear crickets singing in my brain already. You could've moved to Florida buuut you didn't. Because you are pants. New Moon: Okay. Any girl who says she has never been upset over a boy, is lying her lil tush off. However, most of us don't sit in a circulating room staring out the fricking window for months at a time. "Oh my gosh he left me, I'm so alone blah di blah di blah." False. What are you... why ...? No. If this were real life, he'd be banging a barmaid somewhere in New Mexico, okay? (Props to the barmaid... dang.) Get over it, there is a shirtless and beautiful man who will gladly take care of this problem. And I'm as much of an adrenaline junkie as the next guy, but seriously... just stop. Attention. Whore.
All right, my personal favorite topic. Does anyone really not notice how F***ED UP AND NOT OKAY their relationship is?!?! Here's a story: Once upon a time there was an insecure teenage girl (wow... original) and a much older man. He would sneak into her room at night and stare at her while she slept. He then murders people in front of her. He then abandons her and goes to Italy and comes back as soon as she starts to move on with her life and continues to stalk her. He then gets her involved in his gang warfare and then proposes to her. She gets married fresh out of high school and get pregnant. He then proceeds to hate the fetus and later pulls it out of her with his teeth (DAFUQ?!) and kills her and turns her into a flesheating monster. THE END! Wasn't that romantic?!
Why is she like okay, there's a strange boy in my room. I think I'll make out with him and trace my fingers over his perfect chest. FALSE. what what what are you doing? I'd be like excuse me, pepper spray and a shotgun. Yeeaaah...
So that's that.
You know, minus the lack of historical accuracy, historical interest, terrible plot driven nothingness, lack of character development, lack of adjectives other than "perfect" and "beautiful" etc. etc. you get the point. Oh and K.Stew. My totes fave... K.Stew. No really. She was even better in Snow White. T_T
Taylor Lautner on the other hand... holy shiiiitake mushrooms. Break me off a piece of THAT sexy Kit Kat bar. Acting... not so much. Body... Yes please. Face...
Robert Pattinson -- I actually like as an actor. Just not in twilight because uhm... well he looks like he has to urinate throughout the entire film. There is a difference between restraining the want to eat someone (also fricking creepy) and restraining an overly full bladder.
And then there was one...
Okay so. On a daily basis, people here at Brigham Young University tell me that I should start a blog. Why? well because I'm the most sarcastic person on the planet I'm pretty sure and I like write rants about various happening's in my life... oops.. Enjoy the rants. I hope they're funny. If they're not I... really don't care.
Tastefully Offensive, Stay Classy
J.Ellen
Tastefully Offensive, Stay Classy
J.Ellen
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